As I write this, Hurricane Isabel is threatening the mid-Atlantic region. As usual, the DC metro area has gone into Insane Weather Overreacting Mode - the weathermen relishing their one moment in the sun by predicting doom like an Old Testament prophet, frenzied crowds at the supermarket for bread/milk/toilet paper (whether it’s for personal use or for cornering the black market after civilization breaks down, I don’t know), that same list that keeps getting passed around of Things You Absolutely Must Have to Survive in a Post-Hurricane World (flashlights, batteries, the pine needles which will become our new national currency, etc.) and a general sense of overamplified paranoia. People around here go temporarily insane over something like a 6” snowfall, so you can imagine just how irrational people have gotten over this.

I guess I’m of two minds on this whole turn of events. On one hand, the untold death and destruction would be catastrophic. On the other hand, I could really use a day off from work. And on the other other hand, there’s a gigantic tree just outside of my apartment, and a hurricane will probably topple it over and crush me while I’m sitting in my living room watching old Match Game reruns. So I guess my options are another day at work or sudden, horrific death. All I can say is: bring it on Mother Nature, you vicious, insatiable whore.