Much apologies to anyone who has stumbled upon this site recently for the lack of substantial content in the past week or so. I blame it on August. There’s a certain dazed lethargy that everyone seems to get around August, the result of the relentless pounding of summer. Sure, June’s great - shorts! cold drinks! Slurpees! constant air conditioning! - but by August, the day-in day-out heat and humidity and evening thunderstorms have taken their toll. This is particularly painful for those of us who live in massively paved-over, swampy metropolises like DC where the air turns into soup and the harsh landscape offers no relief. Add that to the fact that absolutely nothing happens during August - the top news story the other day was that Carly Simon will finally reveal the subject of "You're So Vain" to the highest bidder, which might have been interesting in 1978 but now barely registers a shrug - and it's a recipe for ennui, mild crankiness and long afternoon naps. So let me try to shake this out of my system by listing off a few mild annoyances.
- These Williamsburg hipsters. I'm sick of them, with their hipper-than-thee attitudes, their mesh-back tricornered hats, their vegan johnnycakes with imported chicory.
- Men who say that they're "lesbians trapped in a man's body." OK, then, get the sex change already.
- The Hilton sisters. Angelyne is still alive, so why do we need more not-really-attractive women who are famous despite having no discernable talents or abilities?
- People who make lame jokes of a racial/sexual nature and then use the old "you're just being PC" defense when you don't laugh. I'm willing to laugh at "offensive" material, but it has to be more original than your run of the mill comedic fodder.
- My upstairs neighbors, who apparently have installed something sounding like a handcranked ice cream maker in the wall right above my bathroom mirror. I guess I should go up there at 3 am the next time I can't sleep, so at least I could get a couple of scoops of Razzleberry Double Nut Fudge out of the deal.