I'm not much for gender wars. Being male seems like a pretty sweet deal to me, a few disadvantages aside. But I've got to speak out against this new TV network for men. I mean, just look at the schedule - it's a vast wasteland of dating shows, Miami Vice reruns and retards destroying themselves in various "shocking" ways. And the original programming is even worse - this animated show with Pamela Anderson has to be the nadir of Stan Lee's career. This makes the Lifetime lineup of disease-of-the-week movies starring Meredith Baxter-Birney and/or Melissa Gilbert look great in comparison. So on behalf of the males of America, I ask TNN to change their name to something that doesn't reflect so poorly on us. Here are some suggestions:

- The FX Network’s Bastard Stepcousin

- Viacom’s L’il Tax Writeoff

- Kill Some Time Until Skinemax Starts Network

- Redstone’s Folly

- The Midlevel Entertainment Company Executive Graveyard